"My own thinking is that “hope” is a cheap emotion unless it causes you to break a sweat - I’m only interested in hope when it inspires us to work. But, of course, that’s the value of hope - not as a balm to our souls, but to the calluses on our palms."
http://sharonastyk.com/2009/09/17/in-the-space-of-the-days-of-awe/
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Friday, August 21, 2009
Those who fight death the most are often those who have no faith/knowledge in what is coming next.
My dear sweet aunt is losing her battle with cancer, yet no one will admit it. It is a game of silence they are playing. Maybe if we don't speak of it, it won't happen. Maybe if we don't plan for it or even acknowledge it out loud it will not happen. And yet it has been obvious and heart wrenching to those that are watching. Everyone knows inside them that it is time to move on.
I can not blame them for not wanting to give her up. She is an awe inspiring person. But I do wish they would accept the will of the Lord and plan accordingly.
2 Ne. 9: 6, 10-12, 19
6 For as death hath passed upon all men, to fulfil the merciful plan of the great Creator, there must needs be a power of resurrection, and the resurrection must needs come unto man by reason of the fall; and the fall came by reason of transgression; and because man became fallen they were cut off from the presence of the Lord.
• • •
10 O how great the goodness of our God, who prepareth a way for our escape from the grasp of this awful monster; yea, that monster, death and hell, which I call the death of the body, and also the death of the spirit.
11 And because of the way of deliverance of our God, the Holy One of Israel, this death, of which I have spoken, which is the temporal, shall deliver up its dead; which death is the grave.
12 And this death of which I have spoken, which is the spiritual death, shall deliver up its dead; which spiritual death is hell; wherefore, death and hell must deliver up their dead, and hell must deliver up its captive spirits, and the grave must deliver up its captive bodies, and the bodies and the spirits of men will be restored one to the other; and it is by the power of the resurrection of the Holy One of Israel.
Alma 40: 11-14
11 Now, concerning the state of the soul between death and the resurrection—Behold, it has been made known unto me by an angel, that the spirits of all men, as soon as they are departed from this mortal body, yea, the spirits of all men, whether they be good or evil, are taken home to that God who gave them life.
12 And then shall it come to pass, that the spirits of those who are righteous are received into a state of happiness, which is called paradise, a state of rest, a state of peace, where they shall rest from all their troubles and from all care, and sorrow.
#
Mosiah 16: 7-9
7 And if Christ had not risen from the dead, or have broken the bands of death that the grave should have no victory, and that death should have no sting, there could have been no resurrection.
8 But there is a resurrection, therefore the grave hath no victory, and the sting of death is swallowed up in Christ.
9 He is the alight and the life of the world; yea, a light that is endless, that can never be darkened; yea, and also a life which is endless, that there can be no more death.
36 Wherefore, fear not even unto death; for in this world your joy is not full, but in me your joy is full.
I wanted to paste these in her guestbook- but that would violate those unwritten laws. So what could I say, if not the comforts in my heart? I shared a memory or two.
My dear sweet aunt is losing her battle with cancer, yet no one will admit it. It is a game of silence they are playing. Maybe if we don't speak of it, it won't happen. Maybe if we don't plan for it or even acknowledge it out loud it will not happen. And yet it has been obvious and heart wrenching to those that are watching. Everyone knows inside them that it is time to move on.
I can not blame them for not wanting to give her up. She is an awe inspiring person. But I do wish they would accept the will of the Lord and plan accordingly.
2 Ne. 9: 6, 10-12, 19
6 For as death hath passed upon all men, to fulfil the merciful plan of the great Creator, there must needs be a power of resurrection, and the resurrection must needs come unto man by reason of the fall; and the fall came by reason of transgression; and because man became fallen they were cut off from the presence of the Lord.
• • •
10 O how great the goodness of our God, who prepareth a way for our escape from the grasp of this awful monster; yea, that monster, death and hell, which I call the death of the body, and also the death of the spirit.
11 And because of the way of deliverance of our God, the Holy One of Israel, this death, of which I have spoken, which is the temporal, shall deliver up its dead; which death is the grave.
12 And this death of which I have spoken, which is the spiritual death, shall deliver up its dead; which spiritual death is hell; wherefore, death and hell must deliver up their dead, and hell must deliver up its captive spirits, and the grave must deliver up its captive bodies, and the bodies and the spirits of men will be restored one to the other; and it is by the power of the resurrection of the Holy One of Israel.
Alma 40: 11-14
11 Now, concerning the state of the soul between death and the resurrection—Behold, it has been made known unto me by an angel, that the spirits of all men, as soon as they are departed from this mortal body, yea, the spirits of all men, whether they be good or evil, are taken home to that God who gave them life.
12 And then shall it come to pass, that the spirits of those who are righteous are received into a state of happiness, which is called paradise, a state of rest, a state of peace, where they shall rest from all their troubles and from all care, and sorrow.
#
Mosiah 16: 7-9
7 And if Christ had not risen from the dead, or have broken the bands of death that the grave should have no victory, and that death should have no sting, there could have been no resurrection.
8 But there is a resurrection, therefore the grave hath no victory, and the sting of death is swallowed up in Christ.
9 He is the alight and the life of the world; yea, a light that is endless, that can never be darkened; yea, and also a life which is endless, that there can be no more death.
36 Wherefore, fear not even unto death; for in this world your joy is not full, but in me your joy is full.
I wanted to paste these in her guestbook- but that would violate those unwritten laws. So what could I say, if not the comforts in my heart? I shared a memory or two.
Sunday, August 02, 2009
cutting off my right hand
I am Preparing to cut off my internet service. In many ways the internet is my eyes, ears and mouth to the larger world. We get our news, family communications and all sorts of banking stuff on line. That won't stop. It will just be slower. I will still have my I- phone, and be able to access the internet and print things at my parent's house.
Doing so will force me away from the computer. I will most likely have a cleaner house and be buying less stuff to put in it. I will also have a much harder time communication with customers and selling items on my website or ebay. I also will not have instant information on all things at my fingertips at all times. That will be hard to adjust to.
Doing so will force me away from the computer. I will most likely have a cleaner house and be buying less stuff to put in it. I will also have a much harder time communication with customers and selling items on my website or ebay. I also will not have instant information on all things at my fingertips at all times. That will be hard to adjust to.
Saturday, August 01, 2009
Disscussion on birth
Birth is a mountain of personal achievement. It is a mountain that once you get to the top you realize you just climbed the first foot hill to the real mountain of parenthood.
Does it matter how you climb that foot hill? It can have an impact on the health of your body, your child (autism has been possible linked to some western medical birthing procedures)... not as much as the fact that you wanted to and that you landed there to continue the climb up that real mountain.
My first birth profoundly affected every fiber of my body- lots of it through hormones designed to help us achieve birth and then nurture the baby so our genetic material passes on.
Many of these same hormones attend to us while we nurse and raise the child. And these same hormones also allows us to create a long term relationship with spouse and friends.
We feel these hormones surge within us when we spy our child doing something cute, or when they snuggle close to our breast. We feel these hormones at work when our husband brings us a gift or does the dishes. These hormones keep us chemically addicted to the baby or to our spouse.
You can build this hormone connection up with others by serving them, caring for them, and by finding gratitude in what they do for you. That means that we can build this bond with just about anybody we choose. We can build it with our spouse and make our marriage stronger, we can build it with our kids (although that comes so naturally to most mothers)we can build with our co-workers, our neighbors or kids we are adopting. And pretty soon we'll find out that service = love.
Does it matter how you climb that foot hill? It can have an impact on the health of your body, your child (autism has been possible linked to some western medical birthing procedures)... not as much as the fact that you wanted to and that you landed there to continue the climb up that real mountain.
My first birth profoundly affected every fiber of my body- lots of it through hormones designed to help us achieve birth and then nurture the baby so our genetic material passes on.
Many of these same hormones attend to us while we nurse and raise the child. And these same hormones also allows us to create a long term relationship with spouse and friends.
We feel these hormones surge within us when we spy our child doing something cute, or when they snuggle close to our breast. We feel these hormones at work when our husband brings us a gift or does the dishes. These hormones keep us chemically addicted to the baby or to our spouse.
You can build this hormone connection up with others by serving them, caring for them, and by finding gratitude in what they do for you. That means that we can build this bond with just about anybody we choose. We can build it with our spouse and make our marriage stronger, we can build it with our kids (although that comes so naturally to most mothers)we can build with our co-workers, our neighbors or kids we are adopting. And pretty soon we'll find out that service = love.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
A willingness to do without
A story that appeared a number of years ago in the Amish publication _Family Life_ told of a busload of tourisst who visited an Amish farmer. The group consisted of people from many religious denominations. One of them said, “We already know all about Jesus Christ, but what does it mean to be Amish?” The Amish fellow thought for a minute and then asked for a show of hands for how many in the tour group had televisions. Every hand went up. Then he asked how many thought that maybe having a television contributed to a lot of social and spiritual problems in society. Again, every hand went up. In light of this, he asked, how many would be willing to give up having television? This time, no hands went up. He went on to explain that this was the essence of being Amish: a willingness to do without something if that thing is not good for them spiritually.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Prayers on the wind
There are dark clouds rolling in- but no warnings,some thunder. I would love a good thunderstorm. We almost had one on Thursday. They (noaa) warned us that it could bring quarter size hail- so Mike and I put the cars in the big building. I gave instructions to Galen to stay away from windows if the winds started to blow. So he took Shannon and the younger sibs and prayed with them that they would be safe from the storm. He let us know that we would be safe from the storms because he had prayed for it. So all we got was rain.- The strong stuff completely by passed us. I felt a little let down ( I wanted a good storm) but I wasn't going to go against the prayers of a child.
When children pray- they do it with such faith, that I can not help but to help the petition be fulfilled.
When children pray- they do it with such faith, that I can not help but to help the petition be fulfilled.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
His work and glory
Sometimes I wonder about him. My tall, but awkward, 10 year son is playing baseball this year. He wanted to sign up for the team, and one of the coaches, who's wife working with him in school one year, actually requested him on his team. He refuses even to try on the baseball pants. He is the only kid out there with khakis under the team jersey. In fact, when they stand straight and in formation to hit the ball, my Galen stands slumped. When they run bases as a group, Galen lags behind by about 2. He refuses to wear baseball or tennis shoes and plays the games in worn out dress shoes. A coach from another town had tagged him as "an easy out." I was furious at the time. Could he not see how special he is? Galen sometimes sits down in right field. He sometimes outright misses a ball aimed straight at him. I am sure beyond any measure of a doubt that he won't make it to college on a baseball scholarship.
But today I came to realize the abilities he does have. He is not here to catch the ball and win the game. He is not here to bat strong and beautiful. He is here to bring about the works of the Lord. Most children get maybe a cheer from their parents when they make a good play. But when Galen gets up to bat, even though he usually swings too early and misses the ball, he is the only child that garners cheers from the parents on both teams. His innocence and happy demeanor rallies them together. He does something to the hearts of those he is near. He is an opportunity to serve and love unconditionally. He is an excuse, that we as human beings, need to be truly human in our outlook and actions.
He brings joy to those who reach out to him. His team has won every game this year (for 1/2 the season so far). I wondered at first if his team mates would think of him as burden, but they have been the sweetest boys to my Galen. The coach and the parents have been very sweet to him too. I think he has made the team something more then sports. I think he makes everything he participates in something more, something better.
It is often exasperating to get Galen to learn new skills. Simple things like tying his shoes or flushing the toilet takes many hours and reminders to teach. Most autistic children do not ever learn to ride a bike, none the less learn to participate in sports with new rules, new schedules and a uniform. But there is a way, when the universe deems the time is right, that these things magically come to pass. When Galen was potty trained it happened in one day, same with riding his bike. Sometimes I wonder what will be the next skill he will magically pick up one night, but tonight I am happy with knowing that other people take joy in cheering on his efforts. He may not come in first, or even third, but when he comes in people will cheer him like he just broke the record.
People amaze me in their capacity to do good. People amaze me in their ability to reach out and befriend, but in our day and age we have been taught to be cautious and careful by portrayals and reports of violence in our media. The way around our caution is the innocent smile of an awkward autistic ten year old.
Sometimes I wonder about him. I wonder if he will go to college, find a wife, become a functioning member of society. I wonder about these things until I see the what he already does for us. He has a function in society. It may not make money, but he allows us to be human.
But today I came to realize the abilities he does have. He is not here to catch the ball and win the game. He is not here to bat strong and beautiful. He is here to bring about the works of the Lord. Most children get maybe a cheer from their parents when they make a good play. But when Galen gets up to bat, even though he usually swings too early and misses the ball, he is the only child that garners cheers from the parents on both teams. His innocence and happy demeanor rallies them together. He does something to the hearts of those he is near. He is an opportunity to serve and love unconditionally. He is an excuse, that we as human beings, need to be truly human in our outlook and actions.
He brings joy to those who reach out to him. His team has won every game this year (for 1/2 the season so far). I wondered at first if his team mates would think of him as burden, but they have been the sweetest boys to my Galen. The coach and the parents have been very sweet to him too. I think he has made the team something more then sports. I think he makes everything he participates in something more, something better.
It is often exasperating to get Galen to learn new skills. Simple things like tying his shoes or flushing the toilet takes many hours and reminders to teach. Most autistic children do not ever learn to ride a bike, none the less learn to participate in sports with new rules, new schedules and a uniform. But there is a way, when the universe deems the time is right, that these things magically come to pass. When Galen was potty trained it happened in one day, same with riding his bike. Sometimes I wonder what will be the next skill he will magically pick up one night, but tonight I am happy with knowing that other people take joy in cheering on his efforts. He may not come in first, or even third, but when he comes in people will cheer him like he just broke the record.
People amaze me in their capacity to do good. People amaze me in their ability to reach out and befriend, but in our day and age we have been taught to be cautious and careful by portrayals and reports of violence in our media. The way around our caution is the innocent smile of an awkward autistic ten year old.
Sometimes I wonder about him. I wonder if he will go to college, find a wife, become a functioning member of society. I wonder about these things until I see the what he already does for us. He has a function in society. It may not make money, but he allows us to be human.
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