Brighter Spirits

I spend about 2 weeks a little while ago hanging around the Mayo Clinic. One of the days, I started noticing the people with special needs. Now, when I am at the Mayo (happens 1-2x/year for one of my own children) I like to play the game of guess who the patient is and guess who their escort is. I had an elderly couple sit at a table next to mine at lunch one day. I wasn't quite sure which one was which until they got up up leave and she was in a wheel chair. But some, like those with downs syndrome or other neuro/muscle issues are more obvious.

But I remember noticing last time I was in Rochester, just how many people there were that had obvious special needs and how the more brighter their spirit shined. Great spirits given a less then perfect body for reasons of growth and protection.

Then I remembered Galen, and how mild his autism is, and yet how bright his spirit is (when you can see through to it.) And then I remembered seeing my Arwen and how bright her spirit shines. It makes me wonder.

So after spending a day fretting and fussing over possibilities, I had a dream yesterday morning. I dreamed that I was in a hospital, it was very over crowded due to some incidence, I heard a lady call out for help. She was in labor and no one was available to help her. Well, I am not afraid of birth, so I came in and helped catch her baby. The first thing she said to me was "Do you want my baby?" She was obviously concerned that she couldn't take care of him. Naturally, I said "sure."

I helped her deliver her baby. It was a fairly easy birth and the child came out with obvious Down's Syndrome with a few other additional deformities (like many toes). But he was beautiful none the less. The nursing staff finally came in, and his deformities were of no surprise to them, but he was healthy, and when I came to take him home, his mother followed me and made sure that he was well settled. When she bid good bye to him for the finally time, this week old baby gave her the biggest smile, with the brightest eyes.

That's when I woke up.

I was immediately grateful for the dream. There is nothing to fear in a special baby, only the fear of the unknown and the terrible waiting period to find out what you may actually be dealing with (if anything). And as we know, the unknown is actually nothing to fear, it is something to be faced with faith and fortitude and gratefulness that we know who these spirits are, and that they are a bigger blessing then we could have imagined.

Arwen

It's a girl, a very special girl, in fact we are headed down to a level 2 ultrasound and a meeting with a geneticist some time soon. There were 2 problems detected on the regular ultrasound that we need a better look at and a specialized opinions about. One of them is a small head, the other is an umbilical cord that is giving unusual ultrasound echoes. At this point neither of those means anything definite. Except that it deserves a closer look.

I cried and researched for a day or so, concerned about it- imagining possible senerios, not knowing what the real issues will end up being.

But, no matter what, I know she is beautiful and had the same profile as her siblings. And I know The Lord has a plan for her.

Coming to peace, accepting the unknown for my baby is hard, but well worth the investment now, because it will be all right and we will find a way to handle whatever is given to us.

Meanwhile, I can continue to live and smile.

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